why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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