One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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