And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
