I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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