I'm lost and stupid without you.
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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