Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
