On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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