My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Randomize
