What a fucking waste of an outfit
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
