And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Randomize
