glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i just had sex bonerless
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize
