Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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