Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Randomize
