when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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