i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
