You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Hippo gnu deer
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
