hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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