I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
