So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
