Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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