I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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