can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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