How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
