So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
