You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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