Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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