well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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