I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize