I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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