Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize