Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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