why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize