Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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