never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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