Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
