you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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