everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
