I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
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