after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
