**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize