i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
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