Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
