Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Randomize