My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Randomize
