somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
