Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
