you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
