Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This baby is an asshole
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
false alarm, still single
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
