i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
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