Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
